Purge Negativity
Do you go day in and day out, dealing with the same crap, hearing the usual drama, being forced to spend time with negative people? Are you spending so much mental energy on, frankly, unnecessary and useless stressors? My question to you is, why? Why not remove these things from your life? Why not take yourself out of these situations and stop humoring them?
“I can’t”
“It’s at my work and I’m forced to work with these people”
“I live with this person”
“They are family, I must keep them in my life”?
Ok, even if you truly CAN’T remove some of these stressors from your life, you CAN at least MINIMIZE you’re time in these situations. For example: find a new roommate, sublet your room/apartment, spend less time with certain family members, talk to your boss about these individuals to devise a game plan, ask for a transfer, find a new job. Don't make excuses, find solutions.
I will tell you from experience; I have removed much of the negativity from my life. Yes, I purged a negative environment, people (both family, friends, and co-workers), and stressors. No, its not easy, and yes, it may take a lot of work, energy, emotion, and even leaving some people whom used to be important in your life. However, what I can say is that…it is worth it. It’s worth it to start each day with a clear mind, focus, brainpower, and mental energy to tackle the day- without these things draining your psyche.
I would recommend taking out a pen and paper and doing some self-reflection. Below is a list of 10 questions to get your mind thinking about enhancing yourself, your environment, and your relationships.
1) Who in your life is draining, or rather not supporting your growth?
2) Who in your life is helping you develop and grow?
3) From the above two questions, who are you spending more of your time with?
4) What environment(s) is toxic for you? Are you spending too much time there? How can you minimize time there?
5) What kind of environment stimulates or fuels you?
6) Where are you spending most of your time? How can this place become more rewarding or fulfilling, or promote more growth?
7) Do you enjoy what you do? Why or why not?
8) Is there a career/job that you know you would enjoy?
9) Do you like who you’ve become? Are you proud of where you are in life?
10) What are you doing to advance through your career and personal development?
I’m aware some of these questions may sound obvious and apparent, however they are simple questions to get the gears turning. They are things that many people overlook and may not take seriously. Apply these questions to all aspects of your life and make a positive/negative list for yourself (similar to a pros/cons list). Steer your life towards the positive side of this list.
For quite some time (about 3+ years), I knew I wasn’t happy, fulfilled, or satisfied- I simply wanted more: more out of my job, more from my relationships, more happiness. However, I didn’t take a look at the big picture. I was concerned about maintaining friendships, having more than a handful of friends, maintaining my reputation, and just what I wanted from life. In some instances I had answers; however in many, I had no answer. I was on a dead end track that was draining my soul.
What I soon realized was that not everyone thought as I did, nor had the same visions; meaning, many are simply content with where they’re at. As John Maxwell speaks about, the road to happiness and reaching your true goals is always uphill, while habits are downhill. All too often, people are unwilling to do what it takes to reach their true aspirations and potential, and are just willing to settle. I hope this isn’t you, and if it is, I hope to help create a path, inspiration, and motivation to take your life in your own hands and go out and get what you seek.
Stay tuned for future posts where we'll talk more about carving the negativity out of your life to make room for your true potential.
In the mean time, click here for an additional article speaking of changing those 'not so good habits' (spoken of early) to boost your happiness, health, and body.